I am moved to comment on recent advancements in the 'science' of skin care preparations, especially those that help you postpone the apparently inevitable face-lift surgery. I imagine they are all essentially an emulsion of some grease with an added magical ingredient to render them better than all the other tubs of water and grease out there.
The latest, and most improbably named candidate additive is brought to us by L’Oréal Paris (but is probably made on a small industrial estate in Watford). It goes by the name of BOSWELOX(tm), no really, that's what they're calling it.
Boswelox is, apparently, a breakthrough phyto-complex that combines a power dose of boswellia serrata extract and manganese, which help reduce the appearance of lines caused by facial micro-contractions. Test have shown reductions of up to 87% in in wrinkles, whatever that means. So now you know.
This clearly beats my previous favourite, Active Liposomes (small hollow vesicles whose double-layer membranes are built like the intercellular substance between the human skin cells). Despit being allegedly capable of increasing skin moisture by nearly 100% within only 7 days of treatment, they have a rubbish name.
I read somewhere that the most effective anti wrinkle substance is pile cream because it stretches the skin, so all they need to do is re-brand and re-package Preparation H and they'd be quids in. To assure success though they'd need to poach the genius who came up with the name Boswelox(tm).
Posted by frazerr at October 7, 2003 04:24 PMThere is something quite apt about "Be-Arsed" endorsing the use of pile cream :p
Posted by: John T Furry at October 7, 2003 05:27 PMI too would endorse the use of pile cream. Especially if you have piles.
Posted by: Jez at October 8, 2003 08:28 AMThe name Boswelox if to fight against BOTOX.
If you do a little search about Bosw. serrata you will see that there is not much to about wrikkles... but maybe anti-inflamatory properties would be interesting. If the Boswelox mixture is made to inflate your skin, it streches the wrikkles so maybe the plant is there to diminish redness or things like that.
Lets talk about liposomes. They don't live when isolated of you body cells!!!
If you uses these creams with science...you are probably being politly arsed! Sorry!
Posted by: MH at November 13, 2003 04:11 PMi have heard of models in the fashion industry using pile cream to get rid of lines,it is far cheaper than these miracle potions which happen to cost a fortune,how safe is it to put it around youre eyes?how long do the effects last?where can i find out more??thanks, becki
Posted by: becki at November 21, 2003 09:37 AMThe surgeon general has determined that the use of pile cream as a substitute for expensive unguents claiming to 'reduce signs of ageing by up to 73%' can seriously damage the fragile health of the pharmaceutical industry.
I note that the same magic potion was recently used in East Enders to shrink Kat Slaters finger to enable the removal of the £20k engagement ring bought for her by loveable (but jilted) gangster Andy. Is there no end to it's efficacy?
Posted by: Alfredo at November 24, 2003 10:22 AMWould it allow me to shrink this square peg I am trying to fit into a round hole ?
Posted by: John T Furry at December 18, 2003 01:40 PMI'm sure bosewelox, is a scientific derivative of a '80's BBC commedy called Bread. In Bread, a dysfunctional family called the Boswels had exciting adventures (not). I suggest the chief scientist at L'Oreal product naming group, is probably Joey Boswel - A man who still has a mullet today.
Posted by: Ed at December 26, 2003 07:34 PMI have a friend nicknamed Boz.
He is a big hairy arsed biker who, when he saw the advert said he was glad they'd found some use for the two tonnes of fat they liposuctioned out of his behind!
YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!
The first time I saw the add for the new cream with Boswelox, I thought of Botox..
Possibly if you just drop the swe from the name you get the real name of the product ?? Bolox ??
Have fun peebs and a Happy New Year to you all.
unless your reading this later on in the year.
byeeeeeeeee :0)
Posted by: Dave at December 31, 2003 07:50 AMThese pseudo science ads are some of the best comedy on TV today. They have me in stitches, I can't wait to hear what the next 'scientific discovery' will be, the mind boggles....
Posted by: jenni at January 1, 2004 12:16 AMBoswelox
As far as I am concearned its as near as dammit an anagram of BOLLOCKS, well as near as it gets.
Posted by: pete at January 1, 2004 02:45 PMI love the name Boswelox, which is clearly a portmanteau word including an ox with Boswell, the chronicler of the life of Dr Samuel Johnson.
What better to slap on my face?
Posted by: Sasha at January 1, 2004 05:39 PM"BOSWELOX" Well what can i say but BOSollocks. My wife asked me to look it up. How manu more naff products do they want women to buy? I suppose as long as there are women who are sad enough to believe all the shit about miracle cures then there will always be a market.
Posted by: Kevin at January 2, 2004 06:16 PMTry nutrillium on for size.
Posted by: Jay at February 7, 2004 11:09 PMwell they're now marketing an antistretchmark cream as an antiaging face cream - Strivectin so really nothing surprises me.
It's just the name boswelox which sounds seriously noddy.
Posted by: yaeh wahetever at April 23, 2004 11:34 PM